I'm not good at math, but....

Today DH and I had some interesting and intellectually challenging conversation on the way to Costco. You see, DH often thinks he is right.

By often, I mean always. And I must admit that he is knowledgeable in a lot of different things, in which I don't even pretend to have knowledge in. Usually, if I don't know the answer I say "I don't know" whereas DH usually pulls some retarded answer out of his....well you know where.

So in the car Aaron asks if more air came out of the vent when it was on high vs low, to which I said yes, and DH says no. DH proceeded to fervently argue his case giving analogies about pipes and water and the like. I, however, believed that if the fan was pushing air out at a faster rate, then of course, more air would be coming out. DH continued to disagree wholeheartedly, and starting talking about molecules, and other technical sounding information, at which point I knew his theory was faltering and he was just trying to talk big in order to try to confuse me. This probably works for him in some cases. Anyway, after having this conversation we went straight into the following one...
We've been considering areas in our budget that we could cut back on or cut out in order to save more money.....


Me: maybe we could cut out the bug spraying (we get the outside of our house sprayed every 2 months to avoid bugs coming in the house...DH hates ants and I hate spiders).

DH: Hmm

Me: That would save about $300 (it's $54 every 2 months)

DH: Um, I beg to differ...it would be more like $600 dollars

In my head I'm thinking...well I know I'm bad at math, but I'm pretty sure it's $300

Me: Um, no if it's $54 every 2 months or every other month, wouldn't that be $300

DH: No, it's $600

Me: huh? How do your figure, if it's about $50 x 6 months, 5x6=30....that's $300 dollars.

DH: No.... say we start in January, that would be $50 (for simplicity's sake), then in March, if we're adding, it would be $100, then in May it would be $150, then in July it's $200....

At this point I'm laughing inside because I know I'm right and when DH gets to the end of his brilliant example that he is going to see the error of his ways, and it is going to be sweet victory for me... whaahaahaa

DH continues: then in September it will be $250

I can't believe he's still counting, he must know that he is wrong by now

DH continues: then in November it will be $300

Me: Haahhaaahhaaaahaaa......brilliant!

It's small victories such as this that keep me going :) He will not live this one down....for a very very long time.


And by "very long time", I mean probably not ever.

:)

Hmmmm, choosing your battles...with your kids...

Yesterday after church we went out for a late breakfast. I love breakfast foods!! However, it is often hard to go out to eat and have anything close to a healthy breakfast. Anyway, we went to the Black Bear diner, which has notoriously HUGE portion sizes. I ordered an egg beater omelet thinking that would be healthier than the 3 egg omelet. However, I was sorely disappointed when it arrived as there was butter or some other oil oozing out of every crevice. So, what did I proceed to do. Spread butter and jam on my big 'ol biscuit and enjoy every bite :).

Okay, back to the title of this post. My dear 4 1/2 year old daughter is not much of an eater. She eats like a bird. She loves ham though, so I ordered her a breakfast sandwich, which came with eggs (not her favorite), cheese (mostly okay), and ham (favorite) on an english muffin (she loves bread like her mother). However, she was about as enthused with her sandwich as I was with my omelet. After I cut it up for her, and she had maybe 2 bites of ham, I looked over and she is munching away on the small piece of kale garnish they had on the plate. Dear husband was getting irritated at her because she wasn't eating her breakfast, and I'm thinking, well at least she's getting some great nutrients in. She proceeded to eat everyone's garnish off their plates. She also ate all the strawberries off the small bowl of fruit that had come with her meal. So all in all, she had a very nutritious, if not darn right healthy meal. Maybe I should order like her. I'll take the garnish and the fruit, hold the meal......

Murphy's Law

What I find baffling and something that has to be involved in someone's conspiracy theory is the fact that the batteries in smoke detectors ONLY GO OUT AT NIGHT. I think there is some sensor that senses the increased CO2 when you are in bed sleeping and then they beep. I've had many-a-smoke detector start beeping in the middle of the night...not to alert of some disastrous fire, but to alert you that the battery MUST be changed right away.

Last night I had been laying in bed no more than 4 1/2 minutes when the first beep sounded. Dear husband was already fast asleep as he had gone to bed earlier. He didn't stir, so I say "babe, the smoke detector just beeped". He says, "I know, I heard it". I'm thinking he was going to pretend he didn't hear it, hope it had been a bad dream, and pray that it didn't beep again. However, he got up, I turned the light on, and he gets the ottoman that's in our room to have a look at the unit.

Interestingly, it's attached to the house electricity as a back-up, so the battery is really only in case the power goes out. We've lived in our house 4 years and never changed any batteries.....did you know it recommends testing the unit WEEKLY?? Really, who does that??

Anyway, he had a hard time getting the unit back on after changing the battery...turns out there is a special compartment on the top of the unit, and you don't have to take it off the ceiling to get to the battery...things you learn after you take the unit off the ceiling. So he goes to get the step ladder from the garage, gets the unit attached to the ceiling, he puts the step ladder away, we turn the lights out.

BEEP

Lights go on, out he goes to get the step ladder, he fidgets with the unit again, tries to read the directions, puts the unit back on the ceiling, takes the step ladder back out to the garage, gets in bed. Lights out.

5 minutes later. BEEP.

Repeat above steps.

Advise hubby not to put step ladder away until morning.

Then we notice that the unit is blinking red instead of green like the rest of them in our house. It is blinking red about every 10 seconds. The directions state that if the unit blinks once a minute or 4 times that there is wrong with this or that...it says nothing about continual blinking every 10 seconds.

Uhhhh.

Enter laptop to google stupid fire detector...discover we are not the only ones with this particular unit who have had this problem. Meanwhile dear husband is still fidgeting with the unit, and thinks he has fixed the problem. He once again reattaches the unit to the ceiling.

This took 45 minutes in total.

Thankfully, there was no additional beeping in the middle of the night.

Side note: hubby bought batteries to replace the rest of the detectors in our house in order to avoid any additional night time disturbances....they aren't in yet...so there is always tonight.

Selective Attention Deficit Disorder

Yes folks, I have just diagnosed myself with S.A.D.D., Selective Attention Deficit Disorder. Last week I got this email from my mother-in-law....have a look



Did you watch the video? Don't skip ahead. Okay, so you've watched it. Did you see it? I didn't see it ...not even the second time around. How sad is that. I couldn't figure out what the audience was laughing about. I guess I can pride myself in being extremely focused!!!
Then as I was trying to find that video online, I came across this one...have a look



The crazy thing is that even though I knew what to expect, I was still diligent about counting the number of passes, and I totally missed the character moonwalking. Yes folks, I have S.A.D.D, and I might need to be medicated.

More coffee ought to do it.

Ta daaaaa

I was on the phone with my dear sister this morning, also making a birthday cake for my son's 7th birthday. The kids were playing "Indiana Jones"...not a single fight, cry, or whine for a solid hour..it was delightful. So I walk into my bedroom to check my email, and this is what I find...

I just laughed...notice he had the red ottoman as a safety net ..safety first. He says that Indiana Jones has to know how to hang...which is true! Then he gets down and looks at himself in the mirror and says, "Wow, Mom, look at my muscles...they look like grown up muscles".

Shattered Dreams

I have mentioned before that hubby and I enjoy playing Faceb*ook games against eachother. For a while we were playing "Scrabulous", which was just like Scrabble, but it wasn't licensed by Has*bro so it got removed. Prior to it's demise I won every single game against Steve. Then it left and we had to find a new game. So lately we've been playing "Scramble", which is just like Boggle. The other night we tried playing the real live version on the kitchen table, but it was too slow to have to write each word down....I can type way faster!! So anyway, we've been playing a couple of games a scramble a day, and I have won every single one. He has not one a single match...not one. We've played 36 matches (5 rounds each). So last night we were playing, and he mentioned that he just wanted to win ONE match...then he would quit playing forever being satisfied in winning just one. Suddenly he squeals with delight saying "I won, HA, I finally won" and on and on he went gloating in his success. I was currently finishing another match we had going one, so after I finished I went and looked at the score page. As usual, every match listed me as the winner. So I asked Steve were he saw that he won. He says "well it must not have updated yet". Well, 12 hours later it still hasn't "updated". Steve thinks it's a conspiracy against him. He swears the computer told him he won. Evil computer! I think his eyes/brain were playing tricks on him....poor guy. Maybe next time honey.

Fashion can be so weird

Sometimes I think fashion designers are only out for the shock value. How is it possible that people would actually wear some of these things...take this for example. Will this come in handy when riding a motorcycle...perhaps...because it matches her dress, which is important. Or maybe it's a new diet plan, almost like a chastity belt...if you can't reach your mouth, you cannot eat. Maybe it's so you can "drive by braille" and pretend you are pacman?? Will you be able to fend off aliens? Does your ipod hook up to it for a surround sound effect??


Or how about this...
It's like a girly Darth Vador...I wonder if it comes with a voice changer?? Probably wouldn't be safe to wear while driving...just a guess.

That is one floppy eared wabbit. Or maybe it's a rain catcher so you don't have to carry around bottled water...you'd just need one VERY long straw to reach the bottom of the dress.

So strange...so very very strange!